Guys, so i don't really know if to identify as an incel, but i have never been loved before by any girl also all the times that i tried like about 11-12 times talking to one it has always ended up with them blocking me or terribly rejecting me, 7 of them did it as soon as i sent a picture of me even thought i spoke good with them i ended uo getting blocked anyways, this has led me to be so insecure myself and realize that looks comes first before personality, i have an asymetric face, one side more densely muscular than the other and i'm going insane about this.
All of this "misfortune" has led me acting in erratic ways to the social norms in my teen years, i struggle on how to act while standing since i costantly overhink in my fucking head, i went trought also a porn addiction which only made all of this worse but i'm still recovering from it, i finally reached 2 months which i never reached before and now i struggle with love life, since now women are only more hypergamous than ever, i really struggle socially since many people think i'm mentally ill or autistic and act as if i'm deeply stupid, and it genuiely feels like hell since if you pointed it out they wouldn't care or take it seriously.
i don't go to parties
i barely hang out with my normie friends which again trash me sometime and underestimate me
i'm stuck in a family prioritizing stupid materialistic things also they create their own problems in a very stupid way that makes me tired to point it out.
I can't really do it with this.
But some time ago i was watching tik tok and i stumbled accross this girl which was living not so far from my city, she actually was aware of things like sharty, soyjak art and all the other chronically online media and relevant (to us) figures, also she is very enriched in political and philosophical knowledge, this was instant love for me she was perfect she was the first woman that i truly liked for her personality: (since most women that i asked out i just choosed them for looks, initially i choose a too high tier, the i went a little down to my league but there it wwas even worse, and the final 2 times that i asked out they were LITERALLY BUT FUCKING LITERALLY LOWER THAN ME IN LOOKS BUT I STILL GOT FUCKING REJECTED SINCE THEY FELT THE SOCIAL POWER BY GETTING ASKED BY SOMEONE PRETTIER BUT NOT MTN+ THAN THEM).
Getting back to this Chudette that i found, she has the same interests as me or at the least a good part like 95% she
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